Scammer of '69

Email Scam:

Subject: CONTACT DELIVERY DEPARTMENT
Date: Wed, 14 May 2008 22:17:41 +0100
IDENTIFICATION NUMBER:XPEL/PKL/9876.

Dear winner,
How are you doing today? I am in receipt of your e-mail and I must say that you should count yourself extremely lucky to have emerged as one of our winners in this year's lucky dip sweepstakes. As you already know your email address was randomly selected along with others from over 125,600 website on the internet. Each email address was attached to a ticket number. Your email address was selected along with others as winners. A certificate of prize claims and some vital documents will be sent along side your winnings check. The documents to be sent are;

1..WINNING CERTIFICATE FROM UK LOTTERY SWEEPSTAKE PROMOTIONS.
2. WINNERS CHEQUE FOR THE VALUE OF ONE MILLION EIGHT HUNDRED AND FIFTY THOUSAND POUNDS STERLING
3.CLEAR SOURCE OF FUNDS CERTIFICATE (C.S.F.C.),
4.CERTIFICATES OF ORIGIN OF FUND (C.O.F.).

Contact me with the contact information below for further instructions on how to send the consignment to your location. Please you should also send your full details to the courier firm with the below details via email to authenticate your lottery winnings. Below is the contact details of the delivery agent you are to forward your full details to them via email.

COURIER SERVICE: Frontier Courier Service
E-MAIL: frontiercourier14@yahoo.com
TEL:+44-703 194 6230
FAX:+44 702 205 5958

Have it in mind that your won prize cannot be deducted from; this is because the total amount has been insured to the real value. This is in accordance with section 13(1)(n) of the national gambling act as adopted in 1993 and amended on 3RD July 1996 by the constitutional assembly.

I will require a concise update on proceedings with the firm as soon as you are in contact with them. If you need any assistance whatsoever, please do not hesitate to let me know. And I do hope you will consider me for a little bonus after you have received your winnings.

Regards,
MR BRIAN H ADAMS

My Reply:

Dear Brian Adams,

First off, I'm doing fine. Secondly, I've only recently started using the Internet and have probably only been to a few hundred of the Internet's 125,600 website. In fact, I didn't even realize that website could be used as a singular or a plural like sheep or meese. Tertiary, you mentioned that "your won prize cannot be deducted from". Dedecuted from what? Do you routinely have people asking to reduce the amount of their winnings over in England? Even though we seem to speak the same language (apart you calling policemen bobbies) we definitely have different ideas on winning prizes. In fact, being an American, if you offered me more money, I'd probably take it. Different strokes for different folks, I guess. Quarterly, my life partner recently had a stroke and I'd like to think that she/he talked to the big man upstairs about letting me win this money. Quintupley, I just wanted to tell you how much I loved the "Summer of 69". I don't know if you can see it, but I just winked into my webcam, because I know what you meant when you wrote that song. Dirty bird! Although at my age, I don't think I could do that kind of thing anymore, do to my severe scoliosis. Luckily I can still wank myself off (that's British for a slapping the bald-headed cyclops, right?) Sexily, I will consider you for a "little bonus" after I receive my winnings. And no, I don't think it was too forward of you to ask. I like someone who's not scared to ask for what they want. And if you're good, you might get more than just a little bonus. And I know you know what I mean, because of the whole "69" thing that we spoke about earlier in the last few sentences. Sevenzees, send me the infotainment and I'll drop it it my malebox. (I winked at my webcam again.) I'm buying you a webcam with my winnings.

Peace and love and shit and kisses,
Scamtastic